Dear Bloggy Friends,
For the past two months I have been looking for a job, with no success. It is frustrating. I have applied to many jobs that I know that I am qualified for, as far as education and job skills go. But I have not worked in four years, and I believe that I am being overlooked because there are so many other job-seekers right now that have current job skills. And many employers are looking for people with active security clearances. Mine hasn't been active since 2005.
My friends and family try to encourage me and cheer me up. A friend on Facebook said: "A blessing in disguise? Sorry to hear about the lack of job. Well, those come and go, but you only have one chance to watch kids grow."
He is right. If I had gone back to work like I had planned to after Emma was born, I would have missed out on so many things. Our weekly visits to the library. Instilling in her a love of learning (and believe me, she loves to learn. She's already learning adding and subtracting!). Watching her snatch a pair of flip-flops from a box heading to the thrift store and saying "I am going to put these in a box and write on it "Mom, don't take these from me"."
Then another bloggy friend left me this comment: "Jobs are overrated; paychecks are not....I'd figure out my passions and talent and make up a job or business around that. Where I work my job was ending and I made up a new position within the company...and they bought it. It's amazing what one can do with a little unconventional thinking."
He, too, is right. But the good thing is that I have already figured out what my passion is....learning.
However, I have to confess something. Deep down inside I am unhappy with myself. When Emma was 6 months old I retured to college to get a Masters degree in engineering. But after 3 or 4 classes I quit. I lost confidence in myself for a while, for some reason. But I have always wanted to get my Masters degree. Heck, if I had the opportunity, I'd go all the way for my PhD....I love learning.
I mean, I solve calculus equations with triple integration for fun. I understand how the Fast Fourier Transform is used in signal processing applications. Terms like modulation and demodulation get me excited. Not in the way that Peter can get me excited...but well....nevermind.
But what I am trying to say is that the desire to continue with my education has never left me, I've just been trying to ignore it. But every day I think about it. Sometimes I even take out some of my old textbooks and just leaf through the pages. I miss feeling smart.
So I am starting to form an idea in my head, and I need to know if I am completely crazy. You see, I think that my lack of finding a job might be God's way of telling me....go back to school. Finish your education. Then you will find your dream job. And I am really starting to think it would work. I would be home during the day with Emma and my nephew, and then take a couple of classes each semester.
I haven't told Peter about this yet, but I know he will agree. I am very fortunate that I have a husband who
So what do you think? Am I crazy? What advice do you have?
Oh, and another thing. Where can I find the money to actually pay for school?
It's funny that you're posting about potential plans you have for future. Especially since he reads your blog.
Well, since I'm still in school, I obviously think it's a good idea. It seems like it would be a great way to still say home with the kids and do something you are passionate about. Then, when Emma is a little older you can start really applying your education.
As far as paying for school...I have no idea. I hadn't realized how costly school really is (it was always funny money...I was making like $30/week tutoring when I was going into college...how in the world would I be able to understand how much $15,000 was?) until I've started considering out how much my monthly payments on my student loans are going to be.
I think it's a great idea. I can't help you figure out funding though, I never managed to secure any myself even though my family was dirt poor.
yep you are crazy.... But that's why I love you. Tell you what if it works I can get a little note made up and talk about "Fast Fourier Transform" ;-) Not that I even know what it is... but hey if it works ;-)
No matter what if your dream is to pursue a PhD... go for it. Not that I let you get away with everything but if that is what you want to do I will support you in it anyway that I can. Well not that I can check your homework but you know ;-)
We'll have to see where the funds can come from but we will have to find them somewhere. And somehow I know we will :-)
Well, this is one of those decisions that only you can make. It sounds to me that you are in a good position to go back to school should you choose. I hate to say it, but your mother is right. You don't HAVE to work. Its great that you have options and you should explore them.
One important thing to remember is that if you are unhappy, it will not only affect you. It will come through in your relationship with Peter and Emma. Either through frustration or resentment that you may not even realize is there.
You definitely need to talk with Peter about this (verbally, not here of course). If he tries to tell you “whatever you want Dear”, you might have to beat his true feelings out of him. Its vital you make this decistion together.
My mom loves learning too, she has two master's and is currently going for her PhD. I? Did not inherit her love of learning. I have hated school since the first day, but it drives my mom crazy because I am smart and I didn't have to try to get almost all A's in my advanced classes. I just don't thirst for education.
If you want to and your husband agrees with you, then I would go for it. It's nice to know your passion.
I say go for it!
It's great to have the opportunity to do what you want. Unfortunately, I HAVE to work. That is something I have been trying very hard to change - hence the whole photography-business-dreaming thing.
But for you? The doors are wide open!
When I say I am supporting you dear you know I mean it. Not just to please you as you know :-)
Cultures are different but you should know me by now ;-)
I think it is a great idea to pick up school again since I know how you love learning, reading, studying and doing research.
There is actually a lot of money out there for people going to school if you just look for it. Especially for people going back to school after taking a little time off. School is always a great idea, but I'll let you do all of the learning for us both.
I think it is an excellent idea...mostly because I am considering it myself. I was applying to grad school when I became pregnant with my first and now I've been home for eight years. I don't regret one second of it. But I miss school and I'm ready to ease back into the job world. The paychecks will come in handy paying for my kids' therapy and such. I am actually excited thinking about it.
I'm glad your husband is supportive. I think he also sees the big picture. That's GREAT!
Ronnica: I am currently paying off a small loan I took out for my bachelors. Yeah, school adds up!
Marie: The entire financial aid process is difficult to understand. So many rules....
Peter: I know we will find it somewhere...
Jason: I don't have to worry about Pete. He may not agree to $1,000 pairs of shoes, but he has always encouraged me when it comes to college.
Stephanie: Wow...I applaud your mom!
Mindi: Thanks!
Playful: Yep, gotta hit up all the scholarship foundations.
DG: Oh yes, Peter is very supportive. Mainly because he knows I don't make spur of the moment decisions, but carefully consider it from all angles.
Go for it! It sounds like something you have really thought out.
First of all, I do not think you are crazy. I think you are right, it just might be divine inspiration in the form of a whisper. Life is funny like that, it's your oyster and you can change it up whenever you like or when the winds blow.
Go with your gut my friend. I suspect very big things are on your horizon.
Go for it, maybe your sister can go back to her job and you take care of the kiddos, just thinking.
I don't have any suggestions for you. Not really. I vote for the back to school option. So many people complain about not getting a high enough paying job (my brother in law) but they have no schooling (my brother in law). I asked down at Costco the other day out of curiosity mainly about salaries and perks. They do NOT get a discount...but pay better than most retail, and pay benefits and bonuses...I'm not dying to do retail, but if I had to...
Like you my pre-kids skills are pretty much gone. I'd go back to school if I had to get a better job. (better than sitting at home with sick kids puking on you! Nah...)
Beyond the general "I like to learn", since school costs money, ask yourself what you think you're moving towards at the end of it. They're are many professions and pursuits that pay money for research or expertise too. I once approached an organization just based on my research knowledge of their products and some ideas I had for them and ended up in a conference call with four of their Vice Presidents to discuss it. In the end we opted not to pursue anything but I very likely could have had a lucrative deal just being and expert for them and doing research...
Take the essence of what you like about study and your passions and look for creative ways that you might be able to apply that going forward. With Peter supporting you...you are in a unique opportunity to actually set your own rules! Or, at the very least, you'll have a clear direction through school with an idea of what you might puruse at the end of it...
Thanks for callout too by the way...I appreciate it!
Hi there! I am going into education as a mature student this autumn, and am so excited about it. Because I am older, I just think that I will get so much more out of my time there... so I am on the 'Go For It' team with regards to your dilemma. Just do it!
I think you should go for it!! You still get to be with the kids, but you also get to be with adults...learning! A win-win if you ask me. :) Now about the money, ummmm, can't help you there. *lol*
As a lifelong student, I say go for it. Loans- that's how to pay for it. If he supports you and you want it it'll be the best thing ever for you and your family. Good luck!